Holy Dogface, Batman!

Mission accomplished. Well done, ladies.

Of course, it’s not so much the out-and-out kick-you-in-the-face ugliness or the Children of the Corn thousand-yard stare robotics, is it? It’s really more wondering just how hard-up a dude’s gotta be to marry one of these chicks – much less multiples! I mean, they live on a farm. After a while, you’d think the sheep and pigs would be more appealing.

Is this a religion or just some sort of kink that I haven’t heard of? I tried Googling “Laura Ingalls Fetish” and searching the episodes archives of The Jerry Springer Show for “Puritan Porn” but got nothing except sideways glances from the monitoring guys in my I.T. department. So I dunno.

What I do know is that I don’t care. And neither should you. There are far more important topics out there that deserve our attention. Like the Cross-Dressing Carny from Springer’s episode #3308.