The Insect Lobby

Women Voters Leaning Toward Obama. Ladybugs Undecided.


Recent polls indicate that, among women voters, Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama holds a slim lead over Republican rival John McCain. Experts think this could be because Obama’s platform is more clearly defined as it relates to female issues, but that it might also be because McCain’s just dog ugly, by comparison.

While the ladies seem to be taken in by Obama’s stylish good looks and voting record on Mother’s Day Out legislation, ladybugs, on the other hand, are much less impressed. “I’m still waiting to hear what his stance on pesticides is,” said Mildred Kopekne of Old Man Wilson’s Garden. “And I have yet to hear him say one thing about the problem of these 10 year-old monsters running around with magnifying glasses.”

Many others who are questioning Obama’s ability to address the issues of the common ladybug prefer to remain anonymous, for fear of retribution. “I definitely don’t want that guy on my bad side. If he wanted to, he could squash me like a bug,” said one unnamed ladybug, obviously unaware of her position in nature’s pecking order.